10 Life Lessons to Excel in Your 30s

While going through the emails what surprised me the most was just how consistent some of the advice was. The same 5-6 pieces of advice came up over and over and over again in different forms across literally 100s of emails. It seems that there really are a few core pieces of advice that are particularly relevant to this decade of your life.

Below are 10 of the most common themes appearing throughout all of the 600 emails. The majority of the article is comprised of dozens of quotes taken from readers. Some are left anonymous. Others have their age listed.

1. Start Saving for Retirement Now, Not Later

“I spent my 20s recklessly, but your 30s should be when you make a big financial push. Retirement planning is not something to put off. Understanding boring things like insurance, 401ks & mortgages is important since its all on your shoulders now. Educate yourself.” (Kash, 41)

The most common piece of advice — so common that almost every single email said at least something about it — was to start getting your financial house in order and to start saving for retirement… today.

There were a few categories this advice fell into:

  • Make it your top priority to pay down all of your debt as soon as possible.
  • Keep an “emergency fund” — there were tons of horror stories about people getting financially ruined by health issues, lawsuits, divorces, bad business deals, etc.
  • Stash away a portion of every paycheck, preferably into a 401k, an IRA or at the least, a savings account.
  • Don’t spend frivolously. Don’t buy a home unless you can afford to get a good mortgage with good rates.
  • Don’t invest in anything you don’t understand. Don’t trust stockbrokers.

One reader said, “If you are in debt more than 10% of your gross annual salary this is a huge red flag. Quit spending, pay off your debt and start saving.” Another wrote, “I would have saved more money in an emergency fund because unexpected expenses really killed my budget. I would have been more diligent about a retirement fund, because now mine looks pretty small.”

Gee whiz! Saving is so easy and so fun!

And then there were the readers who were just completely screwed by their inability to save in their 30s. One reader named Jodi wishes she had started saving 10% of every paycheck when she was 30. Her career took a turn for the worst and now she’s stuck at 57, still living paycheck to paycheck. Another woman, age 62, didn’t save because her husband out-earned her. They later got divorced and she soon ran into health problems, draining all of the money she received in the divorce settlement. She, too, now lives paycheck to paycheck, slowly waiting for the day social security kicks in. Another man related a story of having to be supported by his son because he didn’t save and unexpectedly lost his job in the 2008 crash.

The point was clear: save early and save as much as possible. One woman emailed me saying that she had worked low-wage jobs with two kids in her 30s and still managed to sock away some money in a retirement fund each year. Because she started early and invested wisely, she is now in her 50s and financially stable for the first time in her life. Her point: it’s always possible. You just have to do it.

2. Start Taking Care of Your Health Now, Not Later

“Your mind’s acceptance of age is 10 to 15 years behind your body’s aging. Your health will go faster than you think but it will be very hard to notice, not the least because you don’t want it to happen.” (Tom, 55)

We all know to take care of our health. We all know to eat better and sleep better and exercise more and blah, blah, blah. But just as with the retirement savings, the response from the older readers was loud and unanimous: get healthy and stay healthy now.

So many people said it that I’m not even going to bother quoting anybody else. Their points were pretty much all the same: the way you treat your body has a cumulative effect; it’s not that your body suddenly breaks down one year, it’s been breaking down all along without you noticing. This is the decade to slow down that breakage.

The key to salad is to laugh while eating it.

And this wasn’t just your typical motherly advice to eat your veggies. These were emails from cancer survivors, heart attack survivors, stroke survivors, people with diabetes and blood pressure problems, joint issues and chronic pain. They all said the same thing: “If I could go back, I would start eating better and exercising and I would not stop. I made excuses then. But I had no idea.”

3. Don’t Spend Time with People Who Don’t Treat You Well

“Learn how to say “no” to people, activities and obligations that don’t bring value to your life.” (Hayley, 37)

Gently let go of those who are not making your life better.

After calls to take care of your health and your finances, the most common piece of advice from people looking back at their 30-year-old selves was an interesting one: they would go back and enforce stronger boundaries in their lives and dedicate their time to better people. “Setting healthy boundaries is one of the most loving things you can do for yourself or another person.” (Kristen, 43)

What does that mean specifically?

“Don’t tolerate people who don’t treat you well. Period. Don’t tolerate them for financial reasons. Don’t tolerate them for emotional reasons. Don’t tolerate them for the children’s sake or for convenience sake.” (Jane, 52)

“Don’t settle for mediocre friends, jobs, love, relationships and life.” (Sean, 43)

“Stay away from miserable people… they will consume you, drain you.” (Gabriella, 43)

“Surround yourself and only date people that make you a better version of yourself, that bring out your best parts, love and accept you.” (Xochie)

People typically struggle with boundaries because they find it difficult to hurt someone else’s feelings, or they get caught up in the desire to change the other person or make them treat them the way they want to be treated. This never works. And in fact, it often makes it worse. As one reader wisely said, “Selfishness and self-interest are two different things. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.”

When we’re in our 20s, the world is so open to opportunity and we’re so short on experience that we cling to the people we meet, even if they’ve done nothing to earn our clingage. But by our 30s we’ve learned that good relationships are hard to come by, that there’s no shortage of people to meet and friends to be made, and that there’s no reason to waste our time with people who don’t help us on our life’s path.

4. Be Good to the People You Care About

“Show up with and for your friends. You matter, and your presence matters.” (Jessica, 40)

Conversely, while enforcing stricter boundaries on who we let into our lives, many readers advised to make the time for those friends and family that we do decide to keep close.

“I think sometimes I may have taken some relationships for granted, and when that person is gone, they’re gone. Unfortunately, the older you get, well, things start to happen, and it will affect those closest to you.” (Ed, 45)

“Appreciate those close to you. You can get money back and jobs back, but you can never get time back.” (Anne, 41)

“Tragedy happens in everyone’s life, everyone’s circle of family and friends. Be the person that others can count on when it does. I think that between 30 and 40 is the decade when a lot of shit finally starts to happen that you might have thought never would happen to you or those you love. Parents die, spouses die, babies are still-born, friends get divorced, spouses cheat… the list goes on and on. Helping someone through these times by simply being there, listening and not judging is an honor and will deepen your relationships in ways you probably can’t yet imagine.” (Rebecca, 40)

5. You can’t have everything; Focus On Doing a Few Things Really Well

“Everything in life is a trade-off. You give up one thing to get another and you can’t have it all. Accept that.” (Eldri, 60)

In our 20s we have a lot of dreams. We believe that we have all of the time in the world. I myself remember having illusions that my website would be my first career of many. Little did I know that it took the better part of a decade to even get competent at this. And now that I’m competent and have a major advantage and love what I do, why would I ever trade that in for another career?

“In a word: focus. You can simply get more done in life if you focus on one thing and do it really well. Focus more.” (Ericson, 49)

Another reader: “I would tell myself to focus on one or two goals/aspirations/dreams and really work towards them. Don’t get distracted.” And another: “You have to accept that you cannot do everything. It takes a lot of sacrifice to achieve anything special in life.”

A few readers noted that most people arbitrarily choose their careers in their late teens or early 20s, and as with many of our choices at those ages, they are often wrong choices. It takes years to figure out what we’re good at and what we enjoy doing. But it’s better to focus on our primary strengths and maximize them over the course of lifetime than to half-ass something else.

“I’d tell my 30 year old self to set aside what other people think and identify my natural strengths and what I’m passionate about, and then build a life around those.” (Sara, 58)

For some people, this will mean taking big risks, even in their 30s and beyond. It may mean ditching a career they spent a decade building and giving up money they worked hard for and became accustomed to. Which brings us to…

6. Don’t Be Afraid of Taking Risks, You Can Still Change

“While by age 30 most feel they should have their career dialed in, it is never too late to reset. The individuals that I have seen with the biggest regrets during this decade are those that stay in something that they know is not right. It is such an easy decade to have the days turn to weeks to years, only to wake up at 40 with a mid-life crisis for not taking action on a problem they were aware of 10 years prior but failed to act.” (Richard, 41)

“Biggest regrets I have are almost exclusively things I did *not* do.” (Sam, 47)

Many readers commented on how society tells us that by 30 we should have things “figured out” — our career situation, our dating/marriage situation, our financial situation and so on. But this isn’t true. And, in fact, dozens and dozens of readers implored to not let these social expectations of “being an adult” deter you from taking some major risks and starting over.

“I am about to turn 41 and would tell my 30 year old self that you do not have conform you life to an ideal that you do not believe in. Live your life, don’t let it live you. Don’t be afraid of tearing it all down if you have to, you have the power to build it all back up again.” (Lisa, 41)

Multiple readers related making major career changes in their 30s and being better off for doing so. One left a lucrative job as a military engineer to become a teacher. Twenty years later, he called it one of the best decisions of his life. When I asked my mom this question, her answer was, “I wish I had been willing to think outside the box a bit more. Your dad and I kind of figured we had to do thing A, thing B, thing C, but looking back I realize we didn’t have to at all; we were very narrow in our thinking and our lifestyles and I kind of regret that.”

2888-cm288804edd805f929e5jpeg-CUOW

“Less fear. Less fear. Less fear. I am about to turn 50 next year, and I am just getting that lesson. Fear was such a detrimental driving force in my life at 30. It impacted my marriage, my career, my self-image in a fiercely negative manner. I was guilty of: Assuming conversations that others might be having about me. Thinking that I might fail. Wondering what the outcome might be. If I could do it again, I would have risked more.” (Aida, 49)

7. You Must Continue to Grow and Develop Yourself

“You have two assets that you can never get back once you’ve lost them: your body and your mind. Most people stop growing and working on themselves in their 20s. Most people in their 30s are too busy to worry about self-improvement. But if you’re one of the few who continues to educate themselves, evolve their thinking and take care of their mental and physical health, you will be light-years ahead of the pack by 40.” (Stan, 48)

It follows that if one can still change in their 30s — and should continue to change in their 30s — then one must continue to work to improve and grow. Many readers related the choice of going back to school and getting their degrees in their 30s as one of the most useful things they had ever done. Others talked of taking extra seminars and courses to get a leg up. Others started their first businesses or moved to new countries. Others checked themselves into therapy or began a meditation practice.

A friend of mine stated that at 29, he decided that his mind was his most valuable asset, and he decided to invest in it. He spent thousands of his own education, on seminars, on various therapies. And at 54, he insists that it was one of the best decisions he ever made.

“The number one goal should be to try to become a better person, partner, parent, friend, colleague etc. — in other words to grow as an individual.” (Aimilia, 39)

8. Nobody (Still) Knows What They’re Doing, Get Used to It

“Unless you are already dead — mentally, emotionally, and socially — you cannot anticipate your life 5 years into the future. It will not develop as you expect. So just stop it. Stop assuming you can plan far ahead, stop obsessing about what is happening right now because it will change anyway, and get over the control issue about your life’s direction. Fortunately, because this is true, you can take even more chances and not lose anything; you cannot lose what you never had. Besides, most feelings of loss are in your mind anyway – few matter in the long term.” (Thomas, 56)

In my article about what I learned in my 20s, one of my lessons was “Nobody Knows What They’re Doing,” and that this was good news. Well, according to the 40+ crowd, this continues to be true in one’s 30s and, well, forever it seems; and it continues to be good news forever as well.

“Most of what you think is important now will seem unimportant in 10 or 20 years and that’s OK. That’s called growth. Just try to remember to not take yourself so seriously all the time and be open to it.” (Simon, 57)

“Despite feeling somewhat invincible for the last decade, you really don’t know what’s going to happen and neither does anyone else, no matter how confidently they talk. While this is disturbing to those who cling to permanence or security, it’s truly liberating once you grasp the truth that things are always changing. To finish, there might be times that are really sad. Don’t dull the pain or avoid it. Sorrow is part of everyone’s lifetime and the consequence of an open and passionate heart. Honor that. Above all, be kind to yourself and others, it’s such a brilliant and beautiful ride and keeps on getting better.” (Prue, 38)

“I’m 44. I would remind my 30 year old self that at 40, my 30s would be equally filled with dumb stuff, different stuff, but still dumb stuff… So, 30 year old self, don’t go getting on your high horse. You STILL don’t know it all. And that’s a good thing.” (Shirley, 44)

9. Invest in Your Family; It’s Worth It

“Spend more time with your folks. It’s a different relationship when you’re an adult and it’s up to you how you redefine your interactions. They are always going to see you as their kid until the moment you can make them see you as your own man. Everyone gets old. Everyone dies. Take advantage of the time you have left to set things right and enjoy your family.” (Kash, 41)

I was overwhelmed with amount of responses about family and the power of those responses. Family is the big new relevant topic for this decade for me, because you get it on both ends. Your parents are old and you need to start considering how your relationship with them is going to function as a self-sufficient adult. And then you also need to contemplate creating a family of your own.

Pretty much everybody agreed to get over whatever problems you have with your parents and find a way to make it work with them. One reader wrote, “You’re too old to blame your parents for any of your own short-comings now. At 20 you could get away with it, you’d just left the house. At 30, you’re a grown-up. Seriously. Move on.”

But then there’s the question that plagues every single 30-year-old: to baby or not to baby?

“You don’t have the time. You don’t have the money. You need to perfect your career first. They’ll end your life as you know it. Oh shut up…
Kids are great. They make you better in every way. They push you to your limits. They make you happy. You should not defer having kids. If you are 30, now is the time to get real about this. You will never regret it.” (Kevin, 38)

“It’s never the ‘right time’ for children because you have no idea what you’re getting into until you have one. If you have a good marriage and environment to raise them, err on having them earlier rather than later, you’ll get to enjoy more of them.” (Cindy, 45)

“All my preconceived notions about what a married life is like were wrong. Unless you’ve already been married, everyone’s are. Especially once you have kids. Try to stay open to the experience and fluid as a person; your marriage is worth it, and your happiness seems as much tied to your ability to change and adapt as anything else. I wasn’t planning on having kids. From a purely selfish perspective, this was the dumbest thing of all. Children are the most fulfilling, challenging, and exhausting endeavor anyone can ever undertake. Ever.” (Rich, 44)

What do you want kid?

The consensus about marriage seemed to be that it was worth it, assuming you had a healthy relationship with the right person. If not, you should run the other way (See #3).

But interestingly, I got a number of emails like the following:

“What I know now vs 10-13 years ago is simply this… bars, woman, beaches, drink after drink, clubs, bottle service, trips to different cities because I had no responsibility other than work, etc… I would trade every memory of that life for a good woman that was actually in love with me… and maybe a family. I would add, don’t forgot to actually grow up and start a family and take on responsibilities other than success at work. I am still having a little bit of fun… but sometimes when I go out, I feel like the guy that kept coming back to high school after he graduated (think Matthew McConaughey’s character in Dazed and Confused). I see people in love and on dates everywhere. “Everyone” my age is in their first or second marriage by now! Being perpetually single sounds amazing to all of my married friends but it is not the way one should choose to live their life.” (Anonymous, 43)

“I would have told myself to stop constantly searching for the next best thing and I would have appreciated the relationships that I had with some of the good, genuine guys that truly cared for me. Now I’m always alone and it feels too late.” (Fara, 38)

On the flip side, there were a small handful of emails that took the other side of the coin:

“Don’t feel pressured to get married or have kids if you don’t want to. What makes one person happy doesn’t make everyone happy. I’ve chosen to stay single and childless and I still live a happy and fulfilled life. Do what feels right for you.” (Anonymous, 40)

Conclusion: It seems that while family is not absolutely necessary to have a happy and fulfilling life, the majority of people have found that family is always worth the investment, assuming the relationships are healthy and not toxic and/or abusive.

10. Be kind to yourself, respect yourself

“Be a little selfish and do something for yourself every day, something different once a month and something spectacular every year.” (Nancy, 60)

This one was rarely the central focus of any email, but it was present in some capacity in almost all of them: treat yourself better. Almost everybody said this in one form or another. “There is no one who cares about or thinks about your life a fraction of what you do,” one reader began, and, “life is hard, so learn to love yourself now, it’s harder to learn later,” another reader finished.

Or as Renee, 40, succinctly put it: “Be kind to yourself.”

Many readers included the old cliche: “Don’t sweat the small stuff; and it’s almost all small stuff.” Eldri, 60, wisely said, “When confronted with a perceived problem, ask yourself, ‘Is this going to matter in five years, ten years?’ If not, dwell on it for a few minutes, then let it go.” It seems many readers have focused on the subtle life lesson of simply accepting life as is, warts and all.

Which brings me to the last quote from Martin, age 58:

“When I turned forty my father told me that I’d enjoy my forties because in your twenties you think you know what’s going on, in your thirties you realize you probably don’t, and in your forties you can relax and just accept things. I’m 58 and he was right.”

http://markmanson.net/10-life-lessons-excel-30s 

50 Famous People Who Failed at Their First Attempt at Career Success

As a career success coach, I always advise my clients to stick with it – to demonstrate their commitment to their career success to themselves and others by shaking off setbacks and moving forward.  This morning, I received an email from Katina Solomon at OnLineCollege.org telling me about a new blog post she had just done and asking me to pass it on to my readers.

I loved this post.  It tells the stories of “50 Famously Successful People Who Failed at First.”  These people come from all walks of life.  But they shared one characteristic in common — the commitment to their own career success.  I am very happy to repost it here….

50  Famously Successful People Who Failed at First

Not everyone who’s on top today got there with success after success. More often than not, those who history best remembers were faced with numerous obstacles that forced them to work harder and show more determination than others. Next time you’re feeling down about your failures in college or in a career, keep these fifty famous people in mind and remind yourself that sometimes failure is just the first step towards success.

Business Gurus

These businessmen and the companies they founded are today known around the world, but as these stories show, their beginnings weren’t always smooth.

1. Henry Ford: While Ford is today known for his innovative assembly line and American-made cars, he wasn’t an instant success. In fact, his early businesses failed and left him broke five time before he founded the successful Ford Motor Company.

2. R. H. Macy: Most people are familiar with this large department store chain, but Macy didn’t always have it easy. Macy started seven failed business before finally hitting big with his store in New York City.

3. F. W. Woolworth: Some may not know this name today, but Woolworth was once one of the biggest names in department stores in the U.S. Before starting his own business, young Woolworth worked at a dry goods store and was not allowed to wait on customers because his boss said he lacked the sense needed to do so.

4. Soichiro Honda: The billion-dollar business that is Honda began with a series of failures and fortunate turns of luck. Honda was turned down by Toyota Motor Corporation for a job after interviewing for a job as an engineer, leaving him jobless for quite some time. He started making scooters of his own at home, and spurred on by his neighbors, finally started his own business.

5. Akio Morita: You may not have heard of Morita but you’ve undoubtedly heard of his company, Sony. Sony’s first product was a rice cooker that unfortunately didn’t cook rice so much as burn it, selling less than 100 units. This first setback didn’t stop Morita and his partners as they pushed forward to create a multi-billion dollar company.

6. Bill Gates: Gates didn’t seem like a shoe-in for success after dropping out of Harvard and starting a failed first business with Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen called Traf-O-Data. While this early idea didn’t work, Gates’ later work did, creating the global empire that is Microsoft.

7. Harland David Sanders: Perhaps better known as Colonel Sanders of Kentucky Fried Chicken fame, Sanders had a hard time selling his chicken at first. In fact, his famous secret chicken recipe was rejected 1,009 times before a restaurant accepted it.

8. Walt Disney: Today Disney rakes in billions from merchandise, movies and theme parks around the world, but Walt Disney himself had a bit of a rough start. He was fired by a newspaper editor because, “he lacked imagination and had no good ideas.” After that, Disney started a number of businesses that didn’t last too long and ended with bankruptcy and failure. He kept plugging along, however, and eventually found a recipe for success that worked.

Scientists and Thinkers

These people are often regarded as some of the greatest minds of our century, but they often had to face great obstacles, the ridicule of their peers and the animosity of society.

9. Albert Einstein: Most of us take Einstein’s name as synonymous with genius, but he didn’t always show such promise. Einstein did not speak until he was four and did not read until he was seven, causing his teachers and parents to think he was mentally handicapped, slow and anti-social. Eventually, he was expelled from school and was refused admittance to the Zurich Polytechnic School. It might have taken him a bit longer, but most people would agree that he caught on pretty well in the end, winning the Nobel Prize and changing the face of modern physics.

10. Charles Darwin: In his early years, Darwin gave up on having a medical career and was often chastised by his father for being lazy and too dreamy. Darwin himself wrote, “I was considered by all my masters and my father, a very ordinary boy, rather below the common standard of intellect.” Perhaps they judged too soon, as Darwin today is well-known for his scientific studies.

11. Robert Goddard: Goddard today is hailed for his research and experimentation with liquid-fueled rockets, but during his lifetime his ideas were often rejected and mocked by his scientific peers who thought they were outrageous and impossible. Today rockets and space travel don’t seem far-fetched at all, due largely in part to the work of this scientist who worked against the feelings of the time.
12. Isaac Newton: Newton was undoubtedly a genius when it came to math, but he had some failings early on. He never did particularly well in school and when put in charge of running the family farm, he failed miserably, so poorly in fact that an uncle took charge and sent him off to Cambridge where he finally blossomed into the scholar we know today.

13. Socrates: Despite leaving no written records behind, Socrates is regarded as one of the greatest philosophers of the Classical era. Because of his new ideas, in his own time he was called “an immoral corrupter of youth” and was sentenced to death. Socrates didn’t let this stop him and kept right on, teaching up until he was forced to poison himself.

14. Robert Sternberg: This big name in psychology received a C in his first college introductory psychology class with his teacher telling him that, “there was already a famous Sternberg in psychology and it was obvious there would not be another.” Sternberg showed him, however, graduating from Stanford with exceptional distinction in psychology, summa cum laude, and Phi Beta Kappa and eventually becoming the President of the American Psychological Association.

Inventors

These inventors changed the face of the modern world, but not without a few failed prototypes along the way.

15. Thomas Edison: In his early years, teachers told Edison he was “too stupid to learn anything.” Work was no better, as he was fired from his first two jobs for not being productive enough. Even as an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. Of course, all those unsuccessful attempts finally resulted in the design that worked.

16. Orville and Wilbur Wright: These brothers battled depression and family illness before starting the bicycle shop that would lead them to experimenting with flight. After numerous attempts at creating flying machines, several years of hard work, and tons of failed prototypes, the brothers finally created a plane that could get airborne and stay there.

Public Figures

From politicians to talk show hosts, these figures had a few failures before they came out on top.

17. Winston Churchill: This Nobel Prize-winning, twice-elected Prime Minster of the United Kingdom wasn’t always as well regarded as he is today. Churchill struggled in school and failed the sixth grade. After school he faced many years of political failures, as he was defeated in every election for public office until he finally became the Prime Minister at the ripe old age of 62.

18. Abraham Lincoln: While today he is remembered as one of the greatest leaders of our nation, Lincoln’s life wasn’t so easy. In his youth he went to war a captain and returned a private (if you’re not familiar with military ranks, just know that private is as low as it goes.) Lincoln didn’t stop failing there, however. He started numerous failed business and was defeated in numerous runs he made for public office.

19. Oprah Winfrey: Most people know Oprah as one of the most iconic faces on TV as well as one of the richest and most successful women in the world. Oprah faced a hard road to get to that position, however, enduring a rough and often abusive childhood as well as numerous career setbacks including being fired from her job as a television reporter because she was “unfit for tv.”

20. Harry S. Truman: This WWI vet, Senator, Vice President and eventual President eventually found success in his life, but not without a few missteps along the way. Truman started a store that sold silk shirts and other clothing–seemingly a success at first–only go bankrupt a few years later.

21. Dick Cheney: This recent Vice President and businessman made his way to the White House but managed to flunk out of Yale University, not once, but twice. Former President George W. Bush joked with Cheney about this fact, stating, “So now we know –if you graduate from Yale, you become president. If you drop out, you get to be vice president.”

Hollywood Types

These faces ought to be familiar from the big screen, but these actors, actresses and directors saw their fair share of rejection and failure before they made it big.

22. Jerry Seinfeld: Just about everybody knows who Seinfeld is, but the first time the young comedian walked on stage at a comedy club, he looked out at the audience, froze and was eventually jeered and booed off of the stage. Seinfeld knew he could do it, so he went back the next night, completed his set to laughter and applause, and the rest is history.

23. Fred Astaire: In his first screen test, the testing director of MGM noted that Astaire, “Can’t act. Can’t sing. Slightly bald. Can dance a little.” Astaire went on to become an incredibly successful actor, singer and dancer and kept that note in his Beverly Hills home to remind him of where he came from.

24. Sidney Poitier: After his first audition, Poitier was told by the casting director, “Why don’t you stop wasting people’s time and go out and become a dishwasher or something?” Poitier vowed to show him that he could make it, going on to win an Oscar and become one of the most well-regarded actors in the business.

25. Jeanne Moreau: As a young actress just starting out, this French actress was told by a casting director that she was simply not pretty enough to make it in films. He couldn’t have been more wrong as Moreau when on to star in nearly 100 films and win numerous awards for her performances.

26. Charlie Chaplin: It’s hard to imagine film without the iconic Charlie Chaplin, but his act was initially rejected by Hollywood studio chiefs because they felt it was a little too nonsensical to ever sell.

27. Lucille Ball: During her career, Ball had thirteen Emmy nominations and four wins, also earning the Lifetime Achievement Award from the Kennedy Center Honors. Before starring in I Love Lucy, Ball was widely regarded as a failed actress and a B movie star. Even her drama instructors didn’t feel she could make it, telling her to try another profession. She, of course, proved them all wrong.

28. Harrison Ford: In his first film, Ford was told by the movie execs that he simply didn’t have what it takes to be a star. Today, with numerous hits under his belt, iconic portrayals of characters like Han Solo and Indiana Jones, and a career that stretches decades, Ford can proudly show that he does, in fact, have what it takes.

29. Marilyn Monroe: While Monroe’s star burned out early, she did have a period of great success in her life. Despite a rough upbringing and being told by modeling agents that she should instead consider being a secretary, Monroe became a pin-up, model and actress that still strikes a chord with people today.

30. Oliver Stone: This Oscar-winning filmmaker began his first novel while at Yale, a project that eventually caused him to fail out of school. This would turn out to be a poor decision as the the text was rejected by publishers and was not published until 1998, at which time it was not well-received. After dropping out of school, Stone moved to Vietnam to teach English, later enlisting in the army and fighting in the war, a battle that earning two Purple Hearts and helped him find the inspiration for his later work that often center around war.

Writers and Artists

We’ve all heard about starving artists and struggling writers, but these stories show that sometimes all that work really does pay off with success in the long run.

31. Vincent Van Gogh: During his lifetime, Van Gogh sold only one painting, and this was to a friend and only for a very small amount of money. While Van Gogh was never a success during his life, he plugged on with painting, sometimes starving to complete his over 800 known works. Today, they bring in hundreds of millions.

32. Emily Dickinson: Recluse and poet Emily Dickinson is a commonly read and loved writer. Yet in her lifetime she was all but ignored, having fewer than a dozen poems published out of her almost 1,800 completed works.

33. Theodor Seuss Giesel: Today nearly every child has read The Cat in the Hat or Green Eggs and Ham, yet 27 different publishers rejected Dr. Seuss’s first book To Think That I Saw It on Mulberry Street.

34. Charles Schultz: Schultz’s Peanuts comic strip has had enduring fame, yet this cartoonist had every cartoon he submitted rejected by his high school yearbook staff. Even after high school, Schultz didn’t have it easy, applying and being rejected for a position working with Walt Disney.

35. Steven Spielberg: While today Spielberg’s name is synonymous with big budget, he was rejected from the University of Southern California School of Theater, Film and Television three times. He eventually attended school at another location, only to drop out to become a director before finishing. Thirty-five years after starting his degree, Spielberg returned to school in 2002 to finally complete his work and earn his BA.

36. Stephen King: The first book by this author, the iconic thriller Carrie, received 30 rejections, finally causing King to give up and throw it in the trash. His wife fished it out and encouraged him to resubmit it, and the rest is history, with King now having hundreds of books published the distinction of being one of the best-selling authors of all time.

37. Zane Grey: Incredibly popular in the early 20th century, this adventure book writer began his career as a dentist, something he quickly began to hate. So, he began to write, only to see rejection after rejection for his works, being told eventually that he had no business being a writer and should given up. It took him years, but at 40, Zane finally got his first work published, leaving him with almost 90 books to his name and selling over 50 million copies worldwide.

38. J. K. Rowling: Rowling may be rolling in a lot of Harry Potter dough today, but before she published the series of novels she was nearly penniless, severely depressed, divorced, trying to raise a child on her own while attending school and writing a novel. Rowling went from depending on welfare to survive to being one of the richest women in the world in a span of only five years through her hard work and determination.

39. Monet: Today Monet’s work sells for millions of dollars and hangs in some of the most prestigious institutions in the world. Yet during his own time, it was mocked and rejected by the artistic elite, the Paris Salon. Monet kept at his impressionist style, which caught on and in many ways was a starting point for some major changes to art that ushered in the modern era.

40. Jack London: This well-known American author wasn’t always such a success. While he would go on to publish popular novels like White Fang and The Call of the Wild, his first story received six hundred rejection slips before finally being accepted.

41. Louisa May Alcott: Most people are familiar with Alcott’s most famous work, Little Women. Yet Alcott faced a bit of a battle to get her work out there and was encouraged to find work as a servant by her family to make ends meet. It was her letters back home during her experience as a nurse in the Civil War that gave her the first big break she needed.

Musicians

While their music is some of the best selling, best loved and most popular around the world today, these musicians show that it takes a whole lot of determination to achieve success.

42. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: Mozart began composing at the age of five, writing over 600 pieces of music that today are lauded as some of the best ever created. Yet during his lifetime, Mozart didn’t have such an easy time, and was often restless, leading to his dismissal from a position as a court musician in Salzberg. He struggled to keep the support of the aristocracy and died with little to his name.

43. Elvis Presley: As one of the best-selling artists of all time, Elvis has become a household name even years after his death. But back in 1954, Elvis was still a nobody, and Jimmy Denny, manager of the Grand Ole Opry, fired Elvis Presley after just one performance telling him, “You ain’t going nowhere, son. You ought to go back to driving a truck.”

44. Igor Stravinsky: In 1913 when Stravinsky debuted his now famous Rite of Spring, audiences rioted, running the composer out of town. Yet it was this very work that changed the way composers in the 19th century thought about music and cemented his place in musical history.

45. The Beatles: Few people can deny the lasting power of this super group, still popular with listeners around the world today. Yet when they were just starting out, a recording company told them no. They were told “we don’t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out,” two things the rest of the world couldn’t have disagreed with more.

46. Ludwig van Beethoven: In his formative years, young Beethoven was incredibly awkward on the violin and was often so busy working on his own compositions that he neglected to practice. Despite his love of composing, his teachers felt he was hopeless at it and would never succeed with the violin or in composing. Beethoven kept plugging along, however, and composed some of the best-loved symphonies of all time–five of them while he was completely deaf.

Athletes

While some athletes rocket to fame, others endure a path fraught with a little more adversity, like those listed here.

47. Michael Jordan: Most people wouldn’t believe that a man often lauded as the best basketball player of all time was actually cut from his high school basketball team. Luckily, Jordan didn’t let this setback stop him from playing the game and he has stated, “I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot, and I missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

48. Stan Smith: This tennis player was rejected from even being a lowly ball boy for a Davis Cup tennis match because event organizers felt he was too clumsy and uncoordinated. Smith went on to prove them wrong, showcasing his not-so-clumsy skills by winning Wimbledon, U. S. Open and eight Davis Cups.

49. Babe Ruth: You probably know Babe Ruth because of his home run record (714 during his career), but along with all those home runs came a pretty hefty amount of strikeouts as well (1,330 in all). In fact, for decades he held the record for strikeouts. When asked about this he simply said, “Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.”

50. Tom Landry: As the coach of the Dallas Cowboys, Landry brought the team two Super Bowl victories, five NFC Championship victories and holds the records for the record for the most career wins. He also has the distinction of having one of the worst first seasons on record (winning no games) and winning five or fewer over the next four seasons.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people commit to taking personal responsibility for their career success.  They set high goals and do whatever it takes to achieve them.  They also react positively to the people and events in their lives – especially the negative people and events.  In this post, I told the stories of 50 well known people who ended up being wildly successful and well known.  Let them be an example for you the next time you feel like giving up.

http://www.budbilanich.com/50-famous-people-who-failed-at-their-first-attempt-at-career-success/

When You Come From Nothing, Anything Is Possible: How I Was Able To Live ‘The Dream’

Six years ago today, I signed my first book publishing deal to write “The Dream,” a memoir of my life journey of coming to America, dropping out of high school and founding two companies worth $340 million by the age of 25. Since then, I’ve continued my love for entrepreneurship and have grown my third company, RadiumOne, into my largest success thus far. At the right time, I hope to write my second book with even greater lessons that our future generation’s entrepreneurs could benefit from.

Writing “The Dream” was one of the most humbling and therapeutic experiences I’ve had – it was my way of sharing an unorthodox path to entrepreneurship. From day one, my goal was simple — if I could at least inspire one person, my mission would be accomplished. To my surprise, the book took a life of its own; it became an international best-seller, was translated in multiple languages, was even listed as required reading at some of the largest universities across the globe and was also featured in my interview with Oprah.

If you haven’t had a chance to read “The Dream” — I did want to share a portion of my last chapter in which I summarized the 28 most important lessons that will still resonate with every entrepreneur.

1. Listen to your heart. We tend to do well at things we love, so find something you love — or learn to love what you’re doing.

2. Forget noble motivations. Success comes from wanting to win, so you’ve got to want it bad — you really need that killer instinct. At the end of the day, no matter what they say, it’s not about how you play the game, but about winning. As American football coach Vince Lombardi reportedly said: “Winning isn’t everything. It’s the only thing.”

3. Adjust your attitude. Without the right attitude, you’ll never succeed. You have to believe in yourself, often to the point of madness, because until you prove yourself, the only people who believe in you are your mom and dad (if you’re lucky). If you have any doubts, get out now.

4. Figure out what you’re good at. Very few of us are gifted, so we need to work with the gifts we have. If you’re 5’2″ and you love basketball, let me be the first to tell you: It’s probably not going to happen. (But don’t let me stop you.)

5. Trust your gut. We are complicated creatures. That inexplicable feeling you get sometimes — well, it tends to be right a lot more often than it is wrong. Try not to overanalyze it. Some mysterious Inner You is trying to help by pointing you in the right direction.

6. Do your homework. Before you start anything, make sure you know exactly what you’re getting into. Ignorance is dangerous. What you don’t know, can and will hurt you.

7. Be frugal. The only person you need to impress is yourself, and you’ll be impressed by success, not by a sleek office with Giorgio Armani couches. It boils down to need versus luxury, and a fancy office isn’t going to improve your performance.

8. When it comes to staffing your company, however, don’t be frugal. Find the right people for the right jobs, and pay them what they’re worth. We all love and need rock stars.

9. Hire the smartest people you can find. Smart people make beautiful music together. Lots of smart people, working in unison, can have the force and power of a Beethoven symphony.

10. Don’t expect perfection from yourself or others, but never stop striving for it, and try to inspire others to strive for it too.

11. Learn to listen. Everyone has an opinion, and everyone is entitled to an opinion, and even wrong-headed opinions can open your eyes to things you might otherwise have missed. So listen, even to the people you disagree with — and maybe to them more than the others. Then process what you’ve heard and have the courage of your convictions.

12. Own your mistakes. At the end of the day, every decision you make, even if it was inspired by misguided advice, is your decision. Nobody wins when you start looking for someone to blame. Let it go. Keep moving. Forward movement is everything.

13. Never compromise your morality. We all need to live by a moral code.

14. Never lose sight of the competition. While you’re playing, someone else is working and catching up, so learn to play with one eye on the competition. You’re not going to be on top forever.

15. Watch your back. Somebody should make a T-shirt that says: “For every back, there is a knife.”

16. Don’t procrastinate. Procrastination is just another word for wanting to fail. If you’re not hungry enough, if you’re too lazy to move forward, you’re never going to get anywhere.

17. Don’t do anything by half-measures. Remember: Mediocrity is for losers.

18. And speaking of which, take the advice of that late great comedian, Jimmy Durante: “Be nice to people on the way up because you will probably meet them on the way down.”

19. Always negotiate from a position of strength. If you need something from the other guy, you’ve already lost. People want what they can’t have. Become the thing people want.

20. Expect the unexpected. If you’re ready for anything, you’ll still be unpleasantly surprised — but at least you’ll get through it.

21. Remember: Perception is reality. What they see is more important than what is, so show them what they want to see and tell them what they want to hear. (Read that sentence again. It’s really quite simple, and it makes perfect sense.)

22. Don’t get emotional. Logic and emotions don’t mix.

23. Be fearless. The road to success is paved with failures. If you’re afraid to fail, you’ll never succeed.

24. Pick your battles. The fighting never really ends. Don’t let the meaningless skirmishes sap your strength; you’re in this to win the war.

25. Grow a thick skin — a very thick skin. People will question your ability to succeed, and the loudest among them might make you doubt your own talents, so you’ll need a thick skin to drown out the noise. The silence will help you focus on your objective, and you will prevail.

26.Take chances. Without risk, there is no reward. But make sure it’s intelligent risk. Only a fool bets against Tiger Woods (until it’s time to bet against Tiger Woods).

27. When you commit, you really have to commit. Become unstoppable. And don’t quit. As Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu put it, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”

28. Success is really about making it happen. It’s about dreaming. It’s about finding that one thing you love above all others and then figuring out how to do it better than anyone else. Remember, I didn’t reinvent the wheel. I simply found something that captured my imagination, and then I figured out how to do it better than the next guy.

Most important, I never stopped believing in myself. Business excited me, and I wanted to be good at it. I wanted to be better at it than anyone else. I wanted to win. And winning is about money, sure — but that’s only part of it. To me, winning is about leaping out of bed every morning, excited about the day ahead.

You will have bad days. There will be setbacks. You will have more than your fair share of failures. But at the end of the day, you pick yourself up and keep going. That’s the big secret of life.

You fall down, you get up.

I know this to be true because it worked for me, and I’m just a guy like everybody else.

And that’s what “The Dream” is all about. It’s about reaching for the top without ever compromising your morals. Do the work. Keep your eye on the tiger. Fight like hell. Defy the odds. It’s worth it. Some people think success is the best revenge, and they may be right, but for me it’s much simpler than that:

Success is its own reward.

http://elitedaily.com/money/when-you-come-from-nothing-anything-is-possible-how-i-was-able-to-live-the-dream/

39 Powerful Quotes That Will Change the Way You Live and Think

Life-Changing Inspirational Quotes

Words have power — and these inspiring quotes are guaranteed to challenge the way you think and perhaps even change the way you live.
 

Don’t Hold a Grudge
Don't Hold a Grudge

Quote:

“Forgive others, not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.”

Lesson to learn:

Being angry at someone hurts only you. Let go of your anger, not for the other person, but for yourself. Remember, forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting. Forgiving means accepting that it happened.

How to Truly Listen
How to Truly Listen

Quote:

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand. Most people listen with the intent to reply.”

Lesson to learn:

Ask yourself if you’re truly listening to others or if you’re being distracted by your own chatter. Sometimes, listening means staying silent to give others a chance to talk, soaking it in, then perhaps responding if your response is needed.

Stop Comparing Yourself With Others
Stop Comparing Yourself With Others

Quote:

“The reason why we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind the scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.”

Lesson to learn:

You may think everyone is better than you are, but you are only seeing the image they portray to others. Everyone has their own fears and weaknesses — after all, we’re all human. Stop comparing yourself to others, because you’ll always come up short.

You Never Forget a Feeling
You Never Forget a Feeling

Quote:

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Lesson to learn:

We may not remember the details, but we’ll always remember the impact a person had on us.

Nobody’s Perfect
Nobody's Perfect

Quote:

“Think of the most attractive person you know. Even that person, at some point, has had raging diarrhea.”

Lesson to learn:

Nobody’s perfect — even Jennifer Lawrence has had raging diarrhea. Probably.

Don’t Get Too Comfortable
Don't Get Too Comfortable

Quote:

“A ship is safe in harbor, but that’s not what ships are for.”

Lesson to learn:

We can be safe and comfortable at home, but the point of life is to experience adventure and live it to the fullest.

Pick Yourself Up
Pick Yourself Up

Quote:

“If you’re going through hell, keep going.”

Lesson to learn:

The only way out of a bad situation is to continue in order to get yourself out of it.

It Only Counts When It Hurts
It Only Counts When It Hurts

Quote:

“I don’t count my sit-ups. I only start counting when it starts hurting. That is when I start counting, because then it really counts. That’s what makes you a champion.”

Lesson to learn:

The victories only truly count when they take the most effort. Push yourself by celebrating the ones that made you work for it.

Great Things Always Begin From the Inside
Great Things Always Begin From the Inside

Quote:

“If an egg is broken by an outside force, life ends. If broken by an inside force, life begins. Great things always begin from the inside.”

Lesson to learn:

Real change can only come from within.

Anything Is Possible
Anything Is Possible

Quote:

“The fool didn’t know it was possible, so he did it.”

Lesson to learn:

Don’t be bound by limits you impose on yourself. Anything is possible.

Be Yourself
Be Yourself

Quote:

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”

Lesson to learn:

Be yourself and the people who will accept you for who you are are the ones worth keeping around. Those who won’t accept you for who you are aren’t worth your time and energy.

The Secret to Success
The Secret to Success

Quote:

“You might have more talent than me, you might be smarter than me, you might be sexier than me, you might be all of those things you got it on me in nine categories. But if we get on the treadmill together, there are two things: You’re getting off first, or I’m going to die. It’s really that simple, right?”

Lesson to learn:

Someone else may be better than you in some ways, perhaps because they are naturally gifted, but perseverance and hard work can always win out over talent.

Fail in Your 20s
Fail in Your 20s

Quote:

“The only failure in your 20s is inaction. The rest is trial and error.”

Lesson to learn:

Your 20s is a time for experimentation. By not trying, you are failing. Enjoy taking risks while you’re young!

Time Is Precious
Time Is Precious

Quote:

“Imagine there is a bank account that credits your account each morning with $86,400. It carries over no balance from day to day. Every evening the bank deletes whatever part of the balance you failed to used during the day. What would you do? Draw out every cent, of course? Each of us has such a bank, its name is time. Every morning, it credits you 86,400 seconds. Every night it writes off at a lost, whatever of this you failed to invest to a good purpose. It carries over no balance. It allows no over draft. Each day it opens a new account for you. Each night it burns the remains of the day. If you fail to use the day’s deposits, the loss is yours. There is no drawing against ‘tomorrow.’ You must live in the present on today’s deposits. Invest it so as to get from it the utmost in health, happiness, and health. The clock is running. Make the most of today.”

Lesson to learn:

Make the most of the time you have, because you can never get it back.

There’s No Such Thing as “Busy”
There's No Such Thing as "Busy"

Quote:

“No one is busy in this world. It’s all about priorities.”

Lesson to learn:

The next time you say you’re busy, know that it’s an excuse. If you truly prioritize something, you will make time for it. Be it relationships, friendships, or something else — you always have time for anything if you make time.

Don’t Let It Get to You
Don't Let It Get to You

Quote:

“No one can hurt you without your permission.”

Lesson to learn:

People can only hurt you if you let them.

Appreciate Your Parents
Appreciate Your Parents

Quote:

“Never complain about what your parents couldn’t give you. It was probably all they had.”

Lesson to learn:

A parent’s love for their child has no boundaries. Appreciate what they did for you, because they probably gave you all they could.

Another Side to the Story
Another Side to the Story

Quote:

“You never know the truth. You know ‘a’ truth.”

Lesson to learn:

There isn’t necessarily one truth — the truth can mean so many different things from different perspectives. There’s always another side to a story.

Be Yourself
Be Yourself

Quote:

“Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.”

Lesson to learn:

Be content with who you are, because you are a unique person that no one else can emulate. Embrace your differences and uniqueness, and don’t try to be someone you’re not.

Mind Over Matter
Mind Over Matter

Quote:

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t — either way you’re right.”

Lesson to learn:

You set the tone for your own achievements. If you think you can do it, you will be able to achieve it. If you have a self-defeating attitude, you will likely not be able to attain your goal.

Don’t Judge
Don't Judge

Quote:

“We judge ourselves by our intentions. And others by their actions.”

Lesson to learn:

Remember that you may not be seeing the full picture before you judge others. Their intentions may not match their actions.

It’s Not Wasted Time
It's Not Wasted Time

Quote:

“The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.”

Lesson to learn:

Don’t beat yourself up over activities that are generally not what society considers to be worthwhile. If you’re enjoying yourself and if it’s making you happy, the time is well spent.

Find the Ones Who Are Worth It
Find the Ones Who Are Worth It

Quote:

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just have to find the ones that are worth hurting for.”

Lesson to learn:

We’re all human, so we’re all going to make mistakes. 

Don’t Forget the Little Moments
Don't Forget the Little Moments

Quote:

“The truth is that airports have seen more sincere kisses than the wedding halls, and the walls of hospitals have heard more prayers than the walls of a church.”

Lesson to learn:

Don’t forget that love and faith happens in small moments, too. Treasure those moments.

Things Take Time
Things Take Time

Quote:

“No matter how great the talent or efforts, some thing just take time. You can’t produce a baby in one month by getting nine women pregnant.”

Lesson to learn:

Have patience. Sometimes, you can’t rush things.

Tell the Truth
Tell the Truth

Quote:

“If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.”

Lesson to learn:

Lies and exaggerations can catch up with you, so a good policy to live by is to tell the truth. Then you’ll never have to worry about slipping up.

You’re Awesome!
You're Awesome!

Quote:

“Be the person your dog thinks you are.”

Lesson to learn:

Your dog thinks the world of you. He thinks of you as someone who deserves love, affection, and loyalty. And he sees you for who you are and loves you unconditionally. See yourself through your dog’s eyes. Try to be what he thinks you are to the rest of the world — imagine what the difference you can make to the world.

Your Thoughts Become Reality
Your Thoughts Become Reality

Quote:

“I know for sure what we dwell on is who we become.”

Lesson to learn:

Be careful of what you often think about. If it’s something negative, you can become a negative person. On the other hand, if it’s something positive, you’ll become more positive. Try to think on the bright side of things when you can.

Anger Is a Waste of Time
Anger Is a Waste of Time

Quote:

“For every minute you are angry, you lose 60 seconds of happiness.”

Lesson to learn:

The time and energy you spend on being angry you can spend on something that will better you, like happiness. Let go of your anger and grudges.

Don’t Be Afraid to Ask Questions
Don't Be Afraid to Ask Questions

Quote:

“He who asks a question remains a fool for five minutes. He who does not ask remains a fool forever.”

Lesson to learn:

If you don’t ask questions, you’re not going to find out what the answer is. Don’t be afraid of asking them, because people will appreciate your curiosity.

The True Test of One’s Character
The True Test of One's Character

Quote:

“If you want to know what a man’s like, take a look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.”

Lesson to learn:

The true test of one’s character is the treatment of inferiors, because it’s easy to treat one’s equals and superiors well.

Life Goes On
Life Goes On

Quote:

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.”

Lesson to learn:

Regardless of whether something good or bad happens to you, you can take comfort in the fact that life goes on.

The Memories Live On
The Memories Live On

Quote:

“Death ends a life, not a relationship.”

Lesson to learn:

Mourn the death of a life, but know that the person will always live on in your heart. You have lost only him or her in the physical sense, but your loved ones will always be with you.

The Truth Hurts, but It’s Better Than the Alternative
The Truth Hurts, but It's Better Than the Alternative

Quote:

“But better to get hurt by the truth than comforted with a lie.”

Lesson to learn:

You may be hurt by the truth, but it’s better than living with a lie. Use this approach with your loved ones: it’s generally better to tell them the truth than to lie to them to make them feel better. Being a good friend sometimes means telling your friends what they need to hear rather than what they want to hear.

There’s No Point to Worrying
There's No Point to Worrying

Quote:

“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.”

Lesson to learn:

Worrying is not going to help you resolve anything — it only depletes your internal resources.

Befriend Your Enemies
Befriend Your Enemies

Quote:

“Do I not destroy my enemies by making them my friends?”

Lesson to learn:

By battling your enemy, you are hurting yourself and your enemy. By making him your friend, he will no longer be your enemy. Peace wins over war every time.

Love What You Do
Love What You Do

Quote:

And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it.”

Lesson to learn:

The secret to accomplishing great things at work is to love what you do. Keep taking the steps that will get you closer to a career you love.

Live in the Now
Live in the Now

Quote:

“Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift; that’s why it’s called a present.”

Lesson to learn:

Live in the present and don’t let the past and future trip you up.

Make Your Own Luck
Make Your Own Luck

Quote:

“Luck is the residue of design.”

Lesson to learn:

Many things don’t happen by chance. You can work to make your own luck with smart planning and effort.

 http://www.savvysugar.com/Life-Changing-Inspirational-Quotes-34157152#opening-slide

15 Powerful Beliefs that Will Free You from Negativity

There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference.  The little difference is attitude.  The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.

―W. Clement Stone

When I was a teenager I was the primary target of an extremely persistent bully at my high school.  One day I came home in tears and wrote this on the whiteboard hanging on my bedroom wall:  “I hate bullies.  They make me feel like a loser.”

The next day, while I was at school, my grandmother erased what I wrote on the whiteboard and replaced it with this:  “An entire body of water the size of the Pacific Ocean can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship.  Similarly, all the negativity in the world can’t bring you down unless you allow it to get inside your head.”

And from that day forward I felt better.  I made a conscious decision to stop letting the bully get inside my head.  I changed my beliefs about his level of importance in my life.

It isn’t easy to remain positive when negativity surrounds you, but remember that you have full control over what you choose to believe.  You can effectively defend yourself against all kinds of negativity by adopting simple, yet powerful, beliefs that support a positive outlook in the face of seemingly negative circumstances.

Below you will find 15 such beliefs that have helped free me from the grips of negativity.  I have these beliefs written down in my journal, and I review them on a regular basis, as needed, just to keep them fresh in my mind.  I hope you will join me by adopting them into your own belief system as well…

  1. What other people say about me is their problem, not mine. – Don’t take other people’s negativity personally.  Most negative people behave negatively not just to you, but to everyone they interact with.  What they say and do is a projection of their own reality.  Even when a situation seems personal – even if someone insults you directly – it oftentimes has nothing to do with you.  What others say and do, and the opinions they have, are based entirely on their own self-reflection.
  2. I am free to be ME. – Can you remember who you were before the world told you who you should be?  Happiness is found when you stop comparing yourself to everyone else and what they want.  Stop living for other people and their opinions.  Be true to yourself.  You are the only person in charge of your life.  The only question is: What do you want to do with the rest of it?
  3. Life isn’t perfect, but it sure is great. – Our goal shouldn’t be to create a perfect life, but to live an imperfect life in radical amazement.  To get up every morning and take and good look around in a way that takes nothing for granted.  Everything is extraordinary.  Every day is a gift.  Never treat life casually.  To be spiritual in any way is to be amazed in every way.  
  4. It’s okay to have down days. – Expecting life to be wonderful all the time is wanting to swim in an ocean in which waves only rise up and never come crashing down.  However, when you recognize that the rising and crashing waves are part of the exact same ocean, you are able to let go and be at peace with the reality of these ups and downs.  It becomes clear that life’s ups require life’s downs.
  5. Even when I’m struggling, I have so much to be grateful for. – What if you awoke today with only the things you were thankful for yesterday?  We tend to forget that happiness doesn’t come as a result of getting something we don’t have, but of appreciating everything we do have.  Stress thrives when your worry list is longer than your gratitude list.  Happiness thrives when your gratitude list is longer than your worry list.  So find something to be thankful for right now.
  6. Every experience is just another important lesson. – Disappointments and failure are two of the surest stepping-stones to success.  So don’t let a hard lesson harden your heart.  When things go wrong, learn what you can and then push the tragedies and mistakes aside.  Remember, life’s best lessons are often learned at the worst times and from the worst mistakes.  We must fail in order to know, and hurt in order to grow.  Good things often fall apart so better things can fall together in their place.
  7. Not everything is meant to stay. – Change can be terrifying, yet all positive growth and healing requires change.  Sometimes you have to find the good in goodbye.  Because the past is a place of reference, not a place of residence.  Be strong when everything seems to be going wrong, keep taking small steps, and eventually you will find what you’re looking for.  Learn to trust the journey, even when you do not understand it.
  8. Being wrong is the first step to being right. – Sometimes the wrong choices bring us to the right places.  To be creative and productive in life, you must first lose your fear of being wrong.  And remember, a fear like this can only survive inside you if you let it live there.
  9. I do not need to hold on to what’s holding me back. – You are not what has happened to you; you are what you choose to become.  It’s time to break the beliefs and routines that have been holding you back.  Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer grows you.  Listen to your intuition, not your ego.  When you stop chasing the wrong beliefs, you give the right ideas a chance to catch you.
  10. My happiness today is simply the result of my thinking. – Happiness starts with you – not with your relationships, not with your job, not with your money, but WITH YOU.  It is not always easy to find happiness in ourselves, but it is always impossible to find it elsewhere.  Regardless of the situation you face, your attitude is your choice.  Remember, you can’t have a positive life with a negative attitude.  When negativity controls your thoughts, it limits your behavior, actions, and opportunities.  If you realized how powerful your thoughts were, you would try your best to never think another negative thought again.
  11. Who I spend quality time with matters. – Surround yourself with people who lift you higher – those who see the great potential in you, even when you don’t see it in yourself.
  12. Drama and judgments are a waste of perfect happiness. – Make a promise to yourself.  Promise to stop the drama before it begins, to breathe deeply and peacefully, and to love others and yourself without conditions.  Promise to laugh at your own mistakes, and to realize that no one is perfect; we are all human.  Feelings of self-worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible.  
  13. Most people are judging me far less than it seems. – The truth is, while you’re busy worrying about what others think of you, they’re busy worrying about what you think of them.  Crazy?  Yes, but true.  The good news is this knowledge instantly frees you to let loose and do more of what YOU want.  And while doing so, you’ll also liberate others to do the same.
  14. I can make the world a happier place. – Do your best to help one person every day in some small way.  By becoming the answer to someone’s prayer, we often find the answers to our own.  When the people around us are happier, it’s a lot easier to smile.
  15. The work is worth it. – Lose the expectation that everything in life should be easy.  It rarely is.  In fact, there are no shortcuts to any place worth going.  Enjoy the challenge of your achievements.  See the value in your efforts and be patient with yourself.  And realize that patience is not about waiting; it’s the ability to keep a good attitude while working hard on your dreams.  It’s knowing deep down that the work is well worth it in the end.

http://www.marcandangel.com/2014/02/23/15-powerful-beliefs-that-will-free-you-from-negativity/

Here Are The Top 37 Things Dying People Say They Regret. Learn From It Before It’s Too Late.

Everyone goes through life experiencing enough mistakes and resulting damage that, by the time they are old enough, they have regrets. They say hindsight is 20/20 and when you look back at your life you will know what moments you should have changed. However, we want to help you out. Forget hindsight. Compiled a list of the 37 things you must not do or else you will definitely regret them at the end of your life. It’ll be worth it.

1.) Not traveling when you had the chance. Traveling gets harder as you get older, as more people depend on your presence, day-to-day and it ends up becoming more expensive to bring more people with you.

2.) Not learning another language. You probably took years of another language in high school. You should put it to good use.

3.) Staying in a bad relationship. It may feel hard to get out of a bad relationship, but it’s not worse than staying in it and wasting everyone’s time.

4.) Forgoing sunscreen. It may not seem like much, but sun damage adds up over the years, causing wrinkles and discoloration.

5.) Missing the chance to see your favorite musicians. You never truly know when your favorite band might break up, so seize the day.

6.) Being afraid to do things. Fear can paralyze us, but we can’t let it.

7.) Failing to make physical fitness a priority. As you get older you’ll realize how important it is to take care of your body.

8.) Letting yourself be defined by gender roles. Define yourself, don’t let society do it.

9.) Not quitting a terrible job. You may need to pay rent or provide for a family, but you can’t force yourself to be miserable every day.

10.) Not trying harder in school. Grades are important, but what’s more important is learning how to apply yourself and be dedicated.

11.) Not realizing how beautiful you are. There are many definitions of beauty and you shouldn’t think you’re unworthy of someone’s attention.

12.) Being afraid to say “I love you.” Loving another person is a precious gift, even if that same love wasn’t returned.

13.) Not listening to your parents’ advice. They have a lot more experience than you’ll want to give them credit for.

14.) Spending your youth being self-absorbed. There is more to the world than just you and eventually you’ll realize that.

15.) Caring too much about what other people think. When you’re older, you’ll realize that the opinions of others don’t factor into your true happiness.

16.) Supporting the dreams of others over your own. Being nice is one thing, but sacrificing your happiness isn’t worth it.

17.) Not moving fast enough. Don’t hesitate to make decisions, you’ll end up regretting wasting time.

18.) Holding grudges, especially against those you love. Choose to let go of your pain, instead of dwelling on it.

19.) Not standing up for yourself. Just because others may disagree with you, it doesn’t mean you have to abandon your principals.

20.) Not volunteering enough. There are countless reasons to help other people, especially when they are needy.

21.) Neglecting your teeth. Flossing and brushing may seem annoying, but it’s much better to take care of your teeth while you’re young instead of losing them later.

22.) Missing the chance to talk to your grandparents before they die. They hold a lot of knowledge and they will only be around for a little while.

23.) Working too much. You’re going to miss the good parts of life, or be too stressed to enjoy them, if you do.

24.) Not learning how to cook one good meal. It’ll add to your family and friend get togethers more than you can ever imagine.

25.) Not stopping to appreciate the moment. Quit texting or taking pictures and realize what you are doing when you are doing it.

26.) Failing to finish what you start. Every day is an opportunity that shouldn’t be squandered.

27.) Never mastering one awesome party trick. This seems silly, but just think of how many amazing memories you can create.

28.) Letting yourself be defined by cultural expectations. If your family or country thinks you should do something for a career, you’re not forced to. Never.

29.) Refusing to let friendships run their course. Sometimes people drift apart. Forcing that connection could do more damage than good.

30.) Not playing with your children enough. Kids are joyful and innocent. You should be choosing to fill your life with this joy, not avoiding it.

31.) Never taking a big risk (especially in love). Taking a bigger risk can pay off more than taking a smaller one.

32.) Not taking the time to develop contacts and network. It may seem like schmoozing, but it’ll help your career in the long run.

33.) Worrying too much. Worrying, especially about things that haven’t happened yet, is useless.

34.) Getting caught up in needless drama. Drama can be addictive, but there is no point. Don’t get off on how bad your day is.

35.) Not spending enough time with loved ones. We are all on this earth for a limited amount of time, don’t take that for granted.

36.) Never performing in front of others. This may not be your true calling, but trying it at least once is an important life experience.

37.) Not being grateful sooner. Learn to say thanks and learn to mean it. So many parts of your life will improve if you do.

It’s never too late to change your life, so start by avoiding these things.

http://www.viralnova.com/regret-when-older/